windfall | unfortunately, like a fool, i said, "it's not like i want to let you go"

unfortunately, like a fool, i said, "it's not like i want to let you go"

( continued from here! )

[ Denji stares up Aki's way, visibly annoyed, as she brooks another crest of colorless smoke invading her senses, slender tendrils ghosting over their heads, nearly transparent in the lamplight. This nicotine-addicted slag. Always with the insults… It means kissing! She kissed them! What other meaning could make out have? Still, she roughly erases what characters she was writing (she'd forgotten midway what the stroke pattern to one kanji was), decorating her report in rubber shavings. ]

I mean, you saw Emi-chan's stuff. A bunch of her dresses and skirts looked kinda itchy, but she had some grown-up outfits in the very, very back!

[ Instead of writing what she took, her pencil draws a series of doodles across the page: some peanut snacks, a bottle of tea looted from the mini fridge, a vial that she kindly labels as pirfume, and then the garment bag. ]

So I took one, since I don't got a whole lotta those. [ Most of her closet is filled with clothes from the secondhand store… and some secondhand straight from Aki's own wardrobe. For example, the tanktop she's wearing under her blouse right now. ] It's gonna make my rack look suuuper sexy on me, and then guys will be linin' up outside our apartment to take me on dates to the zoo and all that!

[ No, Denji doesn't know what the proper attire is for a zoo date. ]

…'course I'm not gonna go, seeing as I'm already taken. But you get the idea. What'd you get?

[ If she's remembering correctly, Aki's hands didn't look as full as her own walking out of the dressing room. Did she not take anything and now she's regretting it? ]

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[She wants to go on dates to the zoo in a grown-up outfit... What? Aki is almost afraid to find out when she opens up that bag what she took, if it's going to end up being some sort of buxom costume from one of her shows. Denji doesn't even have the tits to pull off anything like that, so why bother...?]

[But then she brings up what Aki took and... She pauses, pen hovering over the paper as she decides whether to say. This idiot. Her pen goes back to work.]

All I took was a palette. It was still sealed in plastic, I doubt she was planning to use it. Her skin tone is similar to mine, so I figured it would work.

[Not that she really ever wears make-up. Not at work, anyway. But she only has a couple palettes she bought back in high school - may as well snag a high end one while she has the chance.]

You can buy better clothes, you know. I gave you your stipend last week. Not like you pay rent, after all. You should get some sports bras, mine aren't going to fit you.

[ Woah, she really pocketed something? Denji for sure figured her superior would dutifully dismiss the offering with some horseshit platitude of, "Your safety is thanks enough." But makeup, huh… Fully discarding the illusion that she's filling out her report proper, Denji plants an elbow atop her form and tucks her knuckles right below her chin as she appraises Aki's complexion. Emi-chan, obviously, has invested a lot of money to maintain a more youthful exterior in comparison to Aki, who looks profoundly tired with how the fatigue drags at her dark under-eyes. But that aside, her skin is milky smooth and soft, a shimmer of natural highlight dusting her cheekbones; she doesn't really need to apply anything to turn a few heads wherever their assignments take them.

Ugh, it's seriously irritating just looking at her. ]

I'm saving up to try this one fancy gyukatsu place… I was watchin' this TV show, right? Where this lady interviews, like, food experts, doctors, specialist folks, blah, blah, and I swear someone said that red meats help!

[ Her hands come up to give her chest a lift up through her blouse, hopefully to drive her point home. ]

So if I eat enough'a red meat, I'll fit into your size, piece of cake. Then, I don't gotta spend money.

[She thinks eating red meat will plump up her breasts? Aki rolls her eyes at the idea of it.]

That's not how that works. It's... Are you doodling?

[Her eyes have traveled down to the paper to see the little scribbles Denji has made to exemplify the things she took from the dressing room. What the hell is that little box? She reaches out to try and snatch the paper out from under her hand.]

If you're going to make my job take longer, then buzz off. You said you knew how to fill these out properly - don't tell me you lied just because it was Makima asking. [She pulls open a drawer to find an eraser to get the doodles erased. Ugh, she should just get her a new form, the paper is so dirty looking...] You won't get paid if you don't fill this stuff out properly, you know.

It wasn't a lie, it was a bluff — aw, c'mon, don't erase all of it! I was almost done!

[ Her shoulder rams up against Aki's, elbow digging into the older woman's side as she vainly reaches for the form. Ultimately, to no avail, her efforts deflating as she watches all her hard work disappear into thin air. ]

Besides, you're the one who knocked my noggin around pretty good that first day. It's your fault I don't remember how this form stuff goes. Take responsibility, huh!

[ It's then Denji attempts to grab Aki's own form out to take a gander at, eyes flitting from side to side as she scans over the contents. She can't read the majority of it, but what she can do is: ] Hey, lemme just copy yours. We went on the same mission and did the same stuff. What difference does it make?

[ And that way she doesn't need to rattle her brain for words that don't exist. There, problem solved! ]

[Denji snags hers and Aki glowers, frustrated.]

We can't write the same report because we handled the mission in our own ways. The point is to record everything we saw and dealt with as individuals so we don't miss anything - And don't blame me that your head is as empty as your bra.

[It's a low blow to insult her by pointing out her chest size, but Denji was the one who brought up boobs, so who cares. She deserves it.]

[...But she's also Denji, and she's stupid, and allegedly never even went to school to learn what fiends are. Aki sighs and sits back, pulling her drawer open to get a fresh form.]

Look, just sit down... I'll write your half this time, so we can get out of here, already. Tell me how things went, from your perspective.

[ She's a heartbeat away from calling Aki something just as below-the-belt and inciting a brawl inside the office, but the unanticipated offer knocks her off course. Gives her pause.

Her perspective? Denji looks, once again, at Aki's form, her inked handwriting neat and dark, nary a smudge running errant from the characters. As if the longer she stares at it with a knit brow, the better the odds that the words will manifest into known phrases, and from there, eligible sentences she can borrow from. When that doesn't happen, she sighs. ]

Man, from the very beginning? Well… Alright.

[ She kicks off her heels to send the wheels of her chair rolling back, giving Aki the elbow space to write. Chair back squeaking as her weight readjusts to accommodate the crossing of her legs in her seat, she spins in a sedate circle, pondering where to begin. She's not used to having her experiences matter so much. ]

So after we met up with Makima and he told us about the whole protection mission, I took the train to get home, stopped by the konbini to grab a riceball, and then when I got back — oh, and that day, I put my shoes to the side like you always yell at me to! That's important. Anyway, when I got back, I took a pee in the bathroom and then flicked my bean a bit…

[ Stop her. ]

[She thinks, maybe foolishly, that Denji is going to get to the point after some warbling, that maybe she's just trying to pad things out to give her time to remember. But then she says the word "bean" and Aki quickly snaps,] Not that!

[Idiot. Her hand slapped down on the desk, she stares across at Denji with twitching eyes. They make the bags hanging under them look more like wrinkles than the simple lack of sleep from the last couple days.]

You think I want a history of your masturbation habit in a report like this?! Don't tell me the rest of the shit you turn in is full of that crap...!

[The idea of sweet, kind Mr. Makima reading a report written by Denji full of salacious details of how many orgasms she gave herself before going to bed... It makes her want to cringe in embarrassment.]

And you still don't turn the shoes out like I tell you to! Facing the door!

'scuse me?

[ She gapes, a shocked sound mixed between a scoff and a laugh bursts out of her, apparently offended that Aki is calling her out on doing this all wrong when, in her mind, she was following the instructions to a letter. ]

You — [ Incoming! Denji and her rinky-dink chair (that, really, belongs to the other devil hunter), flies at Aki like some out-of-control go-kart at a velocity likely to bruise both of them if she doesn't jump out of the way in time. ]

Who's the nosy one that just said she didn't wanna miss anything for the report, huh?! Huh?!?

[ Seriously, where else was she supposed to start? The mission begins immediately after you're assigned to it, right?? ]

Augh, just like you're stupid shoe rules, you're making this so confusing! Shoes don't even have faces, ponytail brain! Every side of it's basically facing the door!

[Thankfully, Aki has had to dodge much worse. Getting up from her seat to avoid her attack, she rounds the edge of the desk to keep the furniture between them both. Now she's mad.]

I only need information relevant to the fiend you killed! I don't care about anything else!

[She exhales through her nose, teeth grit, staring across at Denji in clear aggravation. How can she not understand this...?!]

What happened to our deal, you brat? [From the hospital, when Denji got nearly killed by a leech devil. About how she'd be obedient and do what Aki says.] What I tell you to do has logic to it. At least try and understand where I'm coming from. What reason would there be to include your convenience store order in a Public Safety report?

[And shoes do, too, have faces. That's what the toe of the shoe is. She's too stupid for words.]

[ The chair rubberbands off the front of the desk, recoiling her into the opposite direction of Aki; the force sends a few items and things jumping, but luckily nothing splashes or breaks across the surface. But what really halts Denji's tantrum is Aki's last question, her clenched fists, raised and ready to box, slowly lowering as she thinks her answer over. ]

Well, that way, Mister Makima will know what my usual is whenever he feels like treating me to somethin'. Y'know, as a reward for kicking ass.

[ …She's serious. ]

If all you wanted to know about was that fiend, then why didn'tcha say so? I killed it. The end. Just write that.

[ Short and sweet. Aki surely can't find a reason to complain about her extremely truncated version of events, right? ]

[...She's serious.]

You can't just write "I killed it" and call it a...

[This is such a waste of time. Aki finally circles back around to pull her chair back into its place and sinks down into it.]

Sometimes I don't know how you survived this long with such low brain mass. [Beat.] Just make a list of all the stuff you took from her dressing room. A written list, no drawings. [She'll write the stupid report.] And don't throw furniture at people.

[ While Aki makes her limited faith in her ability to dictate her perspective clear, and even seems to abandon the attempt to coach her, Denji's mind is elsewhere — thinking about that fiend, now that she's really forced to. From how she's talking to herself, she's definitely not listening to Aki. ]

Yeah, taking that fiend out… It was like, toward the end, it — she wanted to just get dying over with. And she kept mumbling for Emiri.

[ Not Emi-chan, which is the name that woman's fans typically cheered when she was nearby. Maybe she and that fiend knew each other?

Skirting around Aki, Denji boosts herself up onto the desk, half-seated on the new form as she examines her superior's account of the mission again. ]

Hey, hey, did they ever figure out what kinda devil took over that body?

[Aki's hand pauses as she writes when Denji says that, her eyes rising to look at her. She climbs up onto the desk and her brows pull a little low, frowning.]

It said her name? [Then,] Fiends don't usually hold memories from the original body. It's the devil's personality that's taken over. You're sure it said "Emiri?"

[Very strange. She notes down that Denji heard it repeating the target's name.]

When they collected the body, they couldn't name it yet, but I heard them thinking it was an emotion of some kind. Attachment, or something related to entrapment.

["Fear of attachment" is vague, however. Usually the people who name devils are more specific than that.]

Did it say anything else before you killed it? Any other words?

[ She asked about the devil's identity hoping it'd clue them into why that fiend was behaving the way she did, but attachment, entrapment — what's an emotion or a thing that fulfills both ideas, but isn't one or the other completely?

Her fingers twitch, tap-tapping rhythmlessly against the underside of the table. ]

No words, but I think I heard — humming? Really early on, before we slashed up her legs.

[ It isn't really their job to care so much about the story behind a case, let alone a second-class non-citizen, but devils and fiends are existences that are little understood. Just look at herself. It's okay as long as its under the pretense of, like, science and research, right? ]

Um, it went…

[ Denji imitates the hum of the song with a concentrated effort, the tune clumsy and holding too much tension in her throat, but still following a discernible melody. ]

Somethin' like that. You ever heard it before?

[The melody is familiar, but not anything Aki can name - She isn't much of a music listener, never invested in a radio for her apartment. What she can say is...]

Doesn't sound like the kind of music she was singing.

[That fast-paced pop all about believing in yourself or something trite. Aki taps the tip of her pen on the page.]

You know it's important to pay attention to this sort of stuff, right? Not all devils will die just because you slash them up. You should pay attention to their behaviors.

[She's aware she's lecturing, but Denji is her junior. May as well make sure she learns things properly.]

...That song sounds older. Like from last decade. [Very odd. She finally begins writing that down in the report.] Anything else you heard or saw?

[ Although the impromptu lesson may not be fully appreciated, on some level, it does still resonate with Denji, who sullenly stares forward without making a single peep. Sadly, what Aki's saying has merit to it. Thinking back, she'd done a number on that Leech Devil from before, but because she was too weak to take stock of the situation and notice where it'd maneuvered its other limb, it'd managed to one-up her.

She hates to admit it, but without Aki's interference, she would've been dog food. If she keeps racking up debts to this jerk, she'll actually have to start treating her more nicely. ]

Mmmmm… I dunno. Her head looked kinda weird.

[ As most fiend heads do. ]

She had earphones melted into her skull! I think maybe she was sensitive to sound and tryin' to keep everything out, so when we started wreckin' all the band stuff and makin' the speakers go screeee, that just made it easier to off her. She honestly sucked at fighting, and was really jerky when she'd swing her wires or whatever at me.

…That's all I remember.

["Her head looked kinda weird"... Aki stares at her without speaking until she continues and actually says something useful.]

This kind of stuff - This is what's actually important. Information on the fiend. Not your after work activities.

[She looks down and continues to dutifully add the information to the form. Humming, weak to sounds. Saying the target's name at the end. And wishing for death.]

...It's pretty uncommon for devils to want to die. Even when they're in pain. [The situation in the hotel was unique.] In the end, this was a weakling, though. No gun pieces, no casualties. [Again she taps her pen, like both of these facts annoy her. They don't. Not specifically, anyway.] Feels like a waste of our time, protecting some idol when there's more pressing issues out there.

[She slides the form across for Denji to read.] Anyway, this is how your reports should look. You should keep it to the actual job. Got it?

What, so that's it?

[ Denji doesn't read the form, immediately pushing it aside, like she's getting rid of an obstacle that's blocking her view of Aki. ]

Don't turn this into 'nother lecture! We wrote all that… [ Well, it was Aki who did the writing as Denji fumbled through her memories of the fiend's characteristics and oddities. ] And now it's just done? You aren't curious about that fiend at all, or how she and Emi-chan were connected?

[ As she thought form the very beginning, these reports really are a waste of time. There's no payout for remembering so much about other people. ]

At least when I talk about masturbating, I can look forward to gettin' horny again. But writing stuff down about those two, it's like — like getting blue-balled!

[Aki rolls her eyes. She really doesn't get it at all.]

It doesn't matter if they were or weren't. That fiend is dead now. You figured out it was weak to loud noises, and in the future you'll use that kind of training to kill other devils.

[Because that's all they are to her in the end. Practice, for something bigger.]

Save that other talk for your diary. Mister Makima doesn't want to hear about that crap. He wants to hear about how you succeeded in killing a devil - not how you got off on the toilet.

[Beat.]

And stop masturbating in there, you take too long.

[ …The fiend is dead, Emi-chan paid them their dues, and whatever untold story there is to this case will have to be left to some other overworked government employee. So, yeah. That's a wrap to their role in this, she can't argue against that. But what she can argue against is — ]

Hey, you dumped that Shit Devil into my room. I've got nowhere else to have some Denji time! Just piss into a bottle, if you've really gotta go. Isn't that hard with practice.

[ Suddenly, she perks up. Grins. ]

I can even show you. Took me awhile back then, but I'm pretty much a master at aiming now!

[Aki stares at her, the pieces falling into place in her mind. She had blamed it on Power, figuring a girl would never be able to, but...]

Is that where that bottle came from? You? [She found it a few weeks ago, sitting in the corner of Denji and Power's bedroom, when she went in to get the laundry basket. Had even shouted at Power for being a disgusting devil and not to do anything like it again, then ignored his screams that 'twas Denji who doth pissed or whatever the hell. But now she's realizing, for once, that bastard was telling the truth.]

You're seriously disgusting, you know that? No one's ever going to want get like that with someone who pees in bottles.

Disgusting…?

[ Back when she lived with her old man, and he would hog the bathroom because he'd have too much to drink, it'd been all she could do. Of course, there was the option of finding a spot outside to squat, but this alternative usually felt more — decent. Civilized, in her mind, despite having abandoned most other human civilities. And, surely, more appropriate than wetting herself. This happened less frequently as she aged, of course, but there were just moments, you know…! ]

You mean that? Guys are… gonna find me gross?

[...This is the first time she's realized it?]

You asked if you could eat my scabs once. Anyone would find you disgusting.

[What the hell does she think toilets are for? Aki piles up the report and slides it into its folder.]

You're better than you were, at least. You keep all your food on your plate now, and you actually comb out your hair sometimes.

[ First, Aki shames her, then she starts to (sorta) compliment her. What's the deal? Is she coming down with something? They have been traveling quite a lot these past few weeks, tailing Emi-chan, ensuring she gets wherever she needs to safely, while also following case leads on the side.

Denji gives her a sidelong look that, after a moment, snaps away. ]

What's disgusting is how you waste your scabs… [ Under her breath: ] Geez, I don't even know why that sleazy eyepatch guy asked me to set him up with you.

[ Is it considered bad talking the dead if you call them sleazy? …But he was. ]

Are we done now? Can we go home yet?

[What the hell did she just say?]

[Aki looks at her, momentarily taken aback by how effortlessly she brought him up. A brief, unguarded look of shock, and then it's gone, replaced with a scoff as she looks down to push her chair out. No, she's not going to react to that. Not going to give her the pleasure of seeing her feel gutted by the mere mention of him.]

Stay here, I'll drop this off.

[She picks up the folder, knowing he has to go to Makima's office. She has no desire to watch Denji drool over him right now.]

[Piece of shit. Calling him sleazy when Denji is sleazier than anyone else she's ever met.]

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