windfall | what i desire most, what i fear most

Of course I haven't.

[He sounds annoyed just admitting that. Because it's not like he doesn't want to. But it's just not possible. There's no time for that kind of thing. He's too busy after school and there's no time during school, obviously, so what does that leave him? ...Even when they moved in here and finally had a home to themselves, Aki wondered if he would bring someone here at some point. Like bringing your girlfriend to meet your parents. Except then he'd think about introducing anyone to Denji and Power and the thought would vanish from his mind.]

Just - Of course it's something I want to do. And all the other stuff that you do as an adult. [Or like, he guesses. Get married, have kids, or whatever. That stuff, he really doesn't care much about. It just feels normal. Expected. But sex - He's definitely going to have sex at some point. That's the peak of a normal adult life. That and taxes. And killing the gun devil.] But if you think it's so normal, why is it so weird that I want that, too? You're such a weirdo, about this... [He thought Denji just assumed everyone had the same thought process as him.]

How'm I supposed to know…? You're just — different. [ He cringes around the word, different, like he's biting into the tartest part of a fruit. He knows how that sounds. What questions that opens him up to. His forehead looks like it might cave in from the dent the furrow of his brows is making, like he's exhausting every mental faculty within reach to ascertain what exactly is causing his cognitive dissonance. ] It doesn't feel right coming from you. 'cause you're Aki to me. My…

[ …Aniki. His dauntless brother. The boy who chased after him. The boy that brought him back home. The one who nearly blended in with the snow when they first met at the orphanage, who Denji kept running back to. But that really is a weirdo answer, isn't it? ]

…You're like our mom. That's gotta be why.

[ There it is, a non-weirdo answer. ]

No one wants to imagine their mom putting a condom on or doing kinky stuff!

[The expression on Aki's face goes from miffed to... something strange.]

[He can't place what this emotion is at first, or why it hits him so squarely in the chest, straight through his heart. It feels painful and infuriating but mostly painful. Like that stupid acorn song, he thinks suddenly, color growing in his face. From shame or embarrassment or anger, he doesn't know. Because it's the exact same feeling as when he was called the loach. Back then, it was enough to make him cry. Right now...]

[Well, he's obviously not going to cry because Denji said he's like a mom to him. The idea that he's a parental figure - a figure all three of them have lost in one way or another - would maybe be heartening to anyone else. But to Aki, it's like reminding him that he'll never quite be the same as them. He's always going to be a stop on their path, a memory for them of a different time. For all Denji talks about not reaching adulthood, Aki is sure he will, and sure there will be a day when he won't see him every day and he won't listen to him, won't bow to everything he's told him to do. Then what good will he be? Just a nagging mother. A loach to take them on a ride before they head off to their next destination. It's stupid to be offended by this.]

[You're still young, his teachers tell him all the time. Fine. He'll be young about this. Aki turns on his side and rolls over, pulling the blankets with him and facing away from Denji. To Aki, he's simply refusing to acknowledge the statement, won't even give Denji a response. To anyone else, though, he's sulking.]

[ Denji knows he's stepped in it as soon as only quiet hits him. No sarcastic remark, exasperated correction. Aki simply takes the blankets and turns, the warmth of it shifting with him, stretching off Denji's legs. Leaving him out in the cold, bare, wondering what it was he said, whether he should take Pochita and return to his own futon.

He hates when Aki gets like this, freezes him out without explanation — wasn't he the one told him just now, that if Denji gets mad at him, he should tell him? Well, why doesn't that same idea apply to him…?

He watches his back, listens for anything that might clue him in as to what his next move should be. It's like staring at abstract painting with him, though. Nothing ever comes easy or obvious with Aki — all he knows is that it had something to do with him saying he's like their mother, but it's not as if it's the first time. Power and he always joke about that… So maybe it was the timing? Treating him like he's not just another guy? But he isn't, not to him. Denji can't lie about that.

His gaze twitches, homes in on a flicker of movement between Aki's shoulder blades, which could be nothing. Is nothing, most likely. Yet it lures him closer, sidling up behind him, a cautious hand squeezing his shoulder. ]

Aki. Aki, it's okay. Don't cry.

I'm not crying.

[He answers shortly, tone tense. What an idiot. Does he seriously think he'd cry over Denji calling him a mom? He's such an idiot.]

Go to sleep, you dumbass. I'm done talking to you.

[Serves him right for trying to be nice to him after everything that happened. He carried him home, helped wash him off, mixed him an electrolyte drink, made him porridge, let him cuddle with him...]

[Those are all really mom-like things, his brain unhelpfully supplies, and he huffs, squeezing his eyes shut. Whatever. Stupid Denji.]

Well, fine. If you're gonna be a jerk…

[ They can never have a nice moment, the two of them. It must be some sort of curse.

Denji gives his back another long look, then turns his away from him in a similar fashion. He doesn't fully remove himself from Aki's futon, though, rather coming to a rest over on the opposite end, pulling the sheets off his own neighboring futon to drape over himself. Pochita makes an inquiring noise at the change in arrangement, but otherwise, appears unruffled, plodding after him and flopping over against his back.

…After the silence of the room has settled over them, the beginnings of sleep attaching itself to him, sucking away his consciousness like a ravenous parasite, Denji's voice drags itself up from the murk for a moment, just to say, ] G'night.

[ They sleep like that.

The next morning, Power is up before either of them somehow. In no small measure thanks to her going to sleep before them, as well as being mostly uninvolved with the more hectic events of the day prior. She doesn't do something so unnecessarily generous as try to make them breakfast, but she does fully open up all the blinds so that Meowy has plenty of sunlight to bask in this morning and stomp to and fro the bathroom as she gets ready for the day.

Denji groans, huddling deeper inside his blankets to escape from the imminence of morning. For once, he didn't sleep very well — his siblings both know that he moves quite a bit throughout the night, but this time, every turn and ungainly sprawl of his limbs seemed to wake up all his aches and sore spots. Along with him, too. And as much as he tried to return to that blissful, dreamless sleep, all he could think about was his eventual examination that day. It's for that reason Denji stays in bed until the other two have all but finished their usual rituals, and someone's nagging him to get ready, that he finally starts to prepare.

They're probably running a few minutes late by the time Denji's got his shoes on, a half-eaten apple in his mouth. Pochita keeps nipping at his shoelaces and tugging them undone; by the third time, he kneels and tousles the devil's head around in an overly aggressive, overly affectionate rub. ]

Be good and look after the place, alright? Don't let anything burn down.

Nothing's going to burn down.

[Is he still mad about last night, or is he mad because Power used so much shampoo it took her a full ten minutes to rinse it out this morning? Who can say. He nudges him with his school bag, full not with notebooks but with their medical papers this time, whatever he could find from previous visits Denji has made to the doctor.] Let's go. The longer we take, the longer we'll have to wait. [He raises his voice to call out to Power:] We'll be back this afternoon! Do your homework before I get back!

[...That sounds like a mom-thing. He turns around as Power calls back that she definitely, totally will and begins down the path to the stairs.]

Is your head really okay? You didn't feel dizzy when you got up, this morning?

[ No offense, but those questions sound curiously like a mom-thing, too. He doesn't say that, however. He also doesn't say, Chill out, I'm not going to drop dead, though the thought does cross his mind, obvious from the dry look he spares Aki. Still, he should get points for not immediately mouthing off. ]

Oh, so you're back to talking to me now?

[ …Well, half a point. Denji crunches away at the center of his apple, teeth opening up the core to reveal a few seeds. He eats those, too, but he likes to wait until the very end — more satisfying that way. ]

Yeah, I'm real peachy, alright.

[ He did wake up with a sharp tension headache blasting his skull from his fitful sleep, but hydrating and getting some breakfast into his stomach seemed to help tame the sensation into a dull, infrequent drum. Unfortunately, it's put him in a bit of a grouchy mood… But he's not outright trying to take it out on Aki, apparently, as shortly after his grumbling, he contributes: ] …How's your chest?

[Aki shoots him a look over his shoulder. He wasn't bringing it up, so Denji didn't need to bring it up. Figures.]

I'm fine.

[He barely feels it. Only when he leaned over to scoop Meowy's litter and sweep up the stray bits that had fallen out of her bin. But that's nothing. He's been hurt worse, for sure.]

[It's obvious as they head to the station that the town is different. There are a few devil hunters wandering around, some posted up at crosswalks and gazing around, alert yet casual about it, not unlike a crossing officer but they don't give them much more than a glance. At the very least, there's no sign of the ones from the day before, so that's nice. Heading up the platform to the train, he hands Denji his pass before he swipes his own and moves through the gate.]

Don't eat on...

[And pauses. Redirects.]

...I don't know if they're going to let me come with you, this time. Since you're in high school now. But you should just tell the truth, no matter what they ask.

[He pauses, chews his lip briefly. Then finally adds,] Except for stuff about Pochita.

[ In a Podunk place like this, no matter how casually they act, there's no way they won't attract attention. He himself keeps conspicuously eyeing the various hunters as they both cross up the train platform, up until all of them are out of sight. ]

Yeah. Wasn't planning on it. [ He's only had Pochita for a few weeks now, but he's integrated enough into their family, nurturing Denji's smitten feelings for him, that he's hugely unlikely to put the devil at risk. ] I'll just say that I beat the living daylights outta that thing with my bare hands. Wha-pow!

[ He punches the air, nearly dropping his apple, but managing to catch it with both hands. As if worried he might drop it again, he cracks his jaw extra wide to take his juiciest bite out of the apple yet, through the stem and everything, some of the fluid foaming in the corners of his mouth. One last bite, and the rest of it vanishes from sight down his stomach.

But, God, they're both talking about this as seriously as a bunch of militants mapping out their strategy to unseat some unruly despot. It would make him laugh, if the situation weren't weighing on him like something of that actual significance. Facing down probing adults always makes him feel this way. It's hard not to adopt an us vs. them mentality when, every time they scrutinize them, it's with the same sympathetic affect, as if they aren't looking for pitfalls in their precarious arrangement. A reason to step in. Make things worse. ]

Are we still gonna be able to train together like this? You said you'd take me. Don't forget.

[Was he stupid to offer that...? Probably. Probably, he thought he could take care of this on his own. Bulk Denji up in his own way and not have to worry as much once he put on some more muscle, some more fat. But after that devil, he doesn't know. If he had beat that thing himself, maybe it would give more of an explanation to how he collapsed like that. But all he did was charge at it with Pochita. There's a little bit too long of a pause before he finally answers.]

Yeah.

[It's vague and without any real agreement or disagreement. More of a "I heard you" than anything. The train comes rolling into the station and the doors squeak open, the cars packed with people. It's early, he realizes - and people are probably more willing to go by public transit than risk the roads where the devil was spotted. Safety in numbers, or whatever.]

Come on. [He reaches down to take Denji's wrist, tugging him forward and squeezing his way onto the train. All the seats are taken, obviously, even the disabilty seats, so Aki tugs Denji to stand against a wall, somewhere he can lean on it without getting tossed around by the ride. It's a tight fit, but Denji's little. It'll be fine. He reaches up to hold a strap for himself and tries to ignore the feeling of a salaryman standing nearly back to back with him.]

It's just seven stops. [Hopefully he doesn't have to piss or something.]

[ Appeased by that answer, he lets the conversation lull, focused on the crowd now.

The last time he was on a train compartment this occupied by early risers, his bag got snagged on the handle of a baby stroller, so when it moved with him, the mother thought he was abducting her kid — which was stupid, what would he do with a baby who can't even buy a drink from the vending machine on their own? Let alone for him? Anyway, this time, he hugs his belongings to his chest with one arm, wedging his way past the others until they land somewhere manageably stifling. The train starts to move. His shoulder bumps into a young woman in an expensive coat from the initial sway, but his mind's too busy with important matters such as what's for lunch and pretty nurses and the slim hope that his prognosis hasn't declined that he doesn't pay the nasty look she shoots him any special attention.

Similarly to his lack of notice to the look, he doesn't seem to notice the nervous pins and needles percolating in the air. It isn't overly loud inside, despite how they're packed shoulder-to-shoulder like those anchovy tins Power likes to feed the cat, but the people are anxious. Joggers who can't seem to keep their knee from bouncing, like they're ready to bolt at any second. Children looking up at their mothers as they scroll through the latest news. It's not purely because they're impatient to get to their next stop. ]

I'm sick of standing…

[ Denji says this about two stops in, back leaned up the wall, staring out the window at the flying scenery. Earlier a nearby seat had emptied, but just as he and an old geezer with a pinched up back were about to race for it, the lady from before parked her huge toosh in the opening. Shrew.

As a result, he's been pretty annoying, trying to tug Aki closer, or rather his shoulder, for the past while. That way he can both stay leaning and rest his head on something softer than safety glass. Oh, and fish around Aki's bag for gum without much effort. ]

Hey, hey. [ Denji pops a shallow bubble in Aki's face. ] Wouldn't it be funny if there were a devil on the tracks? And the train went ptoom into it? And it made us late.

[The atmosphere feels so tense. Like everyone is on edge, but for good reason. Surely they all know about what happened. It's not every day a high schooler pulls the lucky straw and gets mauled by a devil. It's not like this is Tokyo, after all, right? Aki can't help but let the mood get to him, uncomfortable and back straight... Until Denji starts tugging at his bag, leaning in close so he can go through the pockets and pull out his gum, complain about standing... Aki can ignore most of it, stare out the window at the passing streets, until he says that. His eyes dart to Denji, at once agitated.]

Don't say something like that.

[He swats a hand in his face, not hitting him but rather treating him like a pesky fly.]

Nothing's going to happen. And quit whining, you sound like a kid. It's just a few more stops.

[The train rolls to a stop and even more people pile on, making the already-crowded train even denser. Aki pulls his bag up and holds it between them both, standing nearly forehead-to-forehead with Denji and frowning down at him.]

You'll piss someone off, saying stuff like that in public. You wouldn't be the only one inconvenienced.

I just meant, y'know, what if…

[ Another bubble pops, covering his lips, Denji's jaw moving to bring the substance back inside his mouth. Despite his cavalier attitude, his voice does pitch lower. Aki's right. He's saying stuff that would normally set another person off. Denji's head shifts closer, so that only he can hear the following tucked beneath his minty breath: ]

Devils are attracted to places where there's lots of fear and stuff, right? Wouldn't be weird if more started poppin' up. Folks should relax… Enjoy a joke or something.

[ Not that people can put how they feel in check just like that, but the palpable trepidation and uncertainty doesn't seem a very safe environment to be wading their way through, either. He really can't wait to get off this train — for that reason, as well as due to it being so dang old and creaky. When it comes to another stop, the car jerks a little, causing Denji to lose his balance and smack their foreheads together. He swallows his gum in the surprise. ]

Ow. What the hell do you have in there? [ His hand brushes up Aki's forehead, checking to see for a bump but trying to play it off. ] Rocks? Metal?

[Denji smacks into him and Aki groans, glowering down at him. He turns his head away from the brushes, mistaking them for him swatting at his hair.]

Brains. But yours just felt empty.

[And he (lightly) knocks his forehead against him again, breathing out a puff of amused air.]

Hollow.

[The train jumps slightly, rocking the whole car and Aki jerks forward, both his arms going out and around Denji to pin him into the wall of the train. Someone behind him shoves into his back and there's a definite grunt of discomfort across the entire train car as Aki stays crushed up against him, groaning quietly as he shoots him a look. He better not start whining.]

Just a few more stops... Just deal with it.

[ In reaction to both Aki's insult and the feeling of the panels in the door digging into his back, an annoyed growl motors from his chest. But his words come out as more of a grinded out wheeze as a result of being so compressed. ]

How… many more?! [ Was it four? Three? ] You're all on top of me, it's… [ His breath seethes out, tight and uncomfortable and trying very hard not to think about being chest-to-chest, as well as anything else between them touching. ] So weird… Isn't this like that kabedon thing in manga?

[ God, does Denji know how to talk like a civilized person. The answer is always no. ]

Ugh. Dude, if someone's shoving you, use… that brainy brain of yours and… shove back! [ Through the opening between Aki's arm and his side, Denji shifts his body up against him, trying to jab a hand forward to help him press into the person's lower back. ] Like this!

[Kabedon... What was that again? He kind of remembers, but he thought that was something in a romance - ]

Hey! [He feels Denji's hand go below his arm and shove into the man's back, hears the grunt and groan from a few other people as that man is pushed into another man. Someone looks over and glowers at them both, someone else goes, That hurt! Someone else says, My foot, careful! and Aki ducks his head down, grabbing Denji's arm with a hand to snag it close to his chest, pushed between them as the train car shuffles uncomfortably.]

I'll bite your ear if you do that again! [He whispers that at Denji, more a hiss than anything, his cheeks glowing red from the embarrassment.] Put up with it for five more minutes!

[There's only two stops now. He can deal with being squished that long, can't he? Aki shoves one leg in between Denji's as the people continue to shuffle and adjust, still clutching him tight by the wrist. Trying to take up as little room as possible to avoid collecting any blame, even if the guy who Denji shoved is glaring at them both over his shoulder.]

Eh?!

[ Wrestled back into submission, Denji blanches in record time, suddenly compliant. Immobile. Not a word of disagreement makes it out into the train car, which one could easily pin on him scared shitless of Aki's threat, but no, he's never really shied away from pain, not when it arrives so uninvited all the time — to a certain degree, he's come to expect it throughout the day. A strange prick in his chest, a stutter to his breathing. Plus, Power bites him all the time, in meaner places. He should still be struggling, kicking out at the bastard behind Aki.

Instead, Denji looks overtly mortified. Tries to arch away from his brother's breath buffeting the side of his ear, tingly and warm. The presence of his knee pushing too near to his crotch. Obviously, not intentionally rubbing into him, but as the train putters on, sometimes he'll nudge into Denji and that — that makes his apple strain from a forceful gulp. No. No way. This isn't happening. ]

…Let go, [ he finally hisses, tightly. Volume as close to hushed as he can achieve. ] 'm not gonna do anything.

[Denji rolls over like he's showing Aki his tummy, compliant and with no fight in him. Instead of wondering what it was he did or said that actually got that reaction, however, the relief that he's quieted down and stilled is enough for Aki to keep a look over his shoulder, exhaling through his nose close to Denji's face. He can feel him wilting under him but that's fine. It's fine because they're almost there. If he can just shut up and stand still for a couple more minutes, it'll be just fine.]

[When he finally speaks up, Aki looks at him, distrusting but recognizing the apparent mortification on his face. Just last night he was all curled around him rubbing into his chest, he wants to say - but this is in public, after all. He always yanks Aki out of public view to scent him like a hyper dog that hasn't seen his owner in five minutes. He releases his wrist and, still with the slightly warning look, the announcer on the train calls out the stop at last. Finally.]

[The release on his wrist is short-lived, as it turns out, as Aki turns around when the train slows to a stop and the doors open, a few people moving out and creating just enough ease of tension to allow him to pull Denji along with him toward the exit. Once they're out on the platform and away from the doors he sighs, letting go of him again and reaching up to get his hair out of his face, fix his shirt that got wrinkled from being pressed awkwardly by a guy even taller than him. Then he looks at Denji, at the similar status of his wrinkled shirt and unkempt hair.]

Stand still. [He smooths down his chest and pulls at the hem of his shirt, trying to force the wrinkles flat.] Better? Here, drink some water. [And he offers out the bottle from his bag. He figured they'd make him do a piss test so he's been trying to surreptitiously prep him for that, too.]

[ It doesn't seem that Aki has noticed his reticence, or minds it, since it means a moment of peace in the train car until they reach their stop. Whatever. His jerk brother can ignore him all he wants; it just means that he doesn't notice the weird half-hard situation Denji's got on his hands, which is probably preferable. Like hell he wants to have that conversation, especially not leading up to an appointment they still have to race to. Ugh, he hopes his pants are baggy enough that it isn't obvious. He's hoping the thing will resolve itself as their speed-walking to the clinic, but Aki just has to turn and be nice after — after doing that to him.

Expression disdainful the entire time Aki neatens their clothes, Denji does his best not to make it noticeable how each time his hands skim his chest it makes him want to jump out of his skin and hide somewhere. The water bottle is the last straw, though. He turns his furiously red face away from it. ]

You drink it. We're gonna be late if we just keep standin' around.

[ An odd statement coming from someone who was fantasizing how many ever stops back about there being an accident on the tracks to avoid making their trip. But it's not an untrue one — or rather, he hopes it'll ring true to Aki at least, and he'll focus on that instead of him. ]

[It's really not until Denji actively turns away from him like that when Aki realizes his face is so red. And, sure, it's not paleness, but for someone like Denji - someone who he is currently taking to the doctor for various health conditions - not knowing the cause of the flush over his face is immediately concerning. That, and how he suddenly seems to actually want to go to the doctor.]

[Was that too much for him...? Should he have gotten a cab? But it's such a short distance, taking a taxi would be so costly... Aki presses the back of his hand against Denji's cheek, worry furrowing his brow. His hand slides up to his forehead, but he doesn't feel like he's sick, exactly... God, now what's wrong with him?]

You don't look good. [His eyes flit to the station clock. They've got ten minutes until the appointment - and they still have to walk there, too. Crap, he should have accounted for something like this.] Do you want to sit?

[ That Denji's face only further blisters and inflames when receiving his touch should be a straightforward enough indication of what's ailing him this time: Aki, himself. He strains the linings of his patience to take the temperature check without snapping at him, clearly vexed the whole time, but it's as he suggests sitting Denji smacks his hand away. It's a forceful enough impact that it attracts the attention of others on the platform. He isn't trying to cause a scene or throw a hissy fit or — hurt Aki, but why can't he just… ]

Lay off! I'm not doin' that. That'd only…

[ …Make his problem more obvious, right? An irate growl burgeoning from him, he whips his back to Aki. ]

Sitting around's not gonna fix me, [ he huffily finishes, refusing to resolve his prior thought. Drinking water and eating right isn't either, he'd tell him, if he didn't already know it'd make him upset. They're not going into this check-up for shits and giggles. ]

…And I don't want you to carry me. [ Residual heat still emanates from his words, but he'd meant it as more of a sulky mumble. Something that Aki isn't supposed to really hear. ] I can walk on my own, so give it a rest, would ya?

[Getting slapped away definitely earns them a few glances, but Aki only watches in surprise as Denji turns his back to him and grumbles. Was he that mad that he grabbed him like that...? Or is it just this whole thing, going to the doctor's and dealing with traveling by train this early. Or is it about last night? But his face was red - and it didn't really seem as much like how he looks when he's red with anger. As red as that girl the other day who...]

[He rolls his eyes. So stupid. Whatever. It's nothing like that, he's sure.]

Fine, if you say so. [Pushing the water back into the bag, he pulls it over his shoulder and then walks forward, past him and intending for Denji to follow.] Let's get to the clinic, then, it's close... I think they said it's a block from the station.

[There's already a number of people in the waiting room, but once they're checked in it doesn't take long at all for Denji's name to be called. Aki quickly hands him the folder with all his papers in it, gives him a look that says... something that's supposed to be encouraging but comes off more as severe. What should have been a You can do this looks a lot more like You better not fuck this up. But he knows what he means, so it's fine. It'll all be fine.]

[ Glad to have the ordeal put behind him, he breathes a sigh. His pants tighten less and less on the walk there, so that's good, too. But his relief is short-lived as they enter the lobby, full of others — people who are obviously sick, and some who aren't so obvious. He hates it immediately, the weird tension and uncertainty discharged into the air… Though that could easily be his own projection.

They fill out their forms. They sit. He doesn't get up at first, when his name's called, reluctance writ in the taut set of his features: a stiff back, his downcast gaze, the purse of his lips. The diagnosis is obvious: He doesn't want to go. But he looks to Aki for — something — as his feet drag him up. Aki looks back at him, expression pulled. It… makes him more nervous. His heart that much jerkier. It's probably because he doesn't want to come back with bad news for him.

After that, Denji's gone for a few hours.

They take his measurements. No one says anything as he stands on the scale and it's clear his BMI is below what it should be for someone his age and height.

They take his blood pressure. It's higher than average, but the older woman who releases the velcro snap of the wrap smiles pleasantly at him, all the same. Just for that reason alone, he doesn't mind that she isn't the picture of hot nurse that Power painted for him.

He spends at least another twenty minutes sitting in the check-up room until an actual doctor sees him. She's pretty. But also, she asks him a few questions about school, how he's been feeling, what brings him in today, and such, which Denji answers a few of without mentioning Pochita and only gives some slight insight into the recent devil attack, leaving the rest to the file containing his medical history that he shoves at her. Briefly surprised, she blinks and flips through the papers. Tuts, every so often when something seems to connect for her. He confirms to her twice throughout that the documents are from his latest visit with a physician years ago, and she tuts each time. The sound — is really annoying. Whenever he hears it from her, it makes his knee bounce faster, a constant churn of foot hitting synthetic flooring to help field some of his anxiety.

She takes out her shiny stethoscope and says that he can either remove his shirt or keep it on for portion. Which, of course, makes his eyes widen and his face flush the same shade as when Aki'd pinned him down in the train. He readily sets his shirt aside on the bed. She starts at his chest first, of course, the metal of the instrument cool on his skin. He giggles, stupidly, and she doesn't even bat an eye. The lightweight disc hops to different points of his body, and he can't tell if what she's hearing is good or not, her face utterly flat of any emotion.

When the doctor pulls back, she explains that they'll be giving him a urine test first, then taking his blood, running some x-rays, and lastly doing some exam with a complex name that their sonographer will be using to help visualize how blood moves through his heart. These exams will need from a few days to a week's worth of processing, but he can check their medical portal online for updates. There are more tests she'd like to run, but those would have to be scheduled out further in advance.

Seeing the look on Denji's face, she pauses. Fishes out some candy from her pocket to give him.

"Here. Get through it, and you can grab some more of these from that jar over there — " She points to one sitting next to the desktop monitor, sounding as if she's rehearsed this particular bribe several times before with smaller children. "Alright?"

Denji's hell yeah! is so loud, it surely runs throughout the hallways of the clinic and out the front door.

By the time he's released, he's woozy, wobbling out with a set of pamphlets on eating and exercise recommendations to get him by until they call him back in for a review of his results. They took way more blood than he's used to giving, even to Pochita, so his steps are rickety and unsteady, but he manages to crumble into one of the chairs in the lobby, his neck folded back. His eyes close, only to flicker open a short moment after, feeling a shadow fall across him. Aki.

Expectantly, he reaches both arms up to him for help getting back on his feet. ]

…I wonder, is it normal to fall in love with your doc?

[ As normal as this question must be. ]

By the way, you want some candy? I took a lot.

[Denji is gone which makes it that much easier for Aki to trudge up when his own name is called. He's much more forthright about everything, explaning he doesn't have medical issues but that getting a body thrown into him the day before has left him aching ever since. It's just a bruise, is the prognosis, and his breathing should return to normal in no time. There's an air of exhaustion for him to even be here, and Aki feels it. Feels the shame of asking about something as minor as a bruise. Someone died and Denji nearly passed out and Aki is standing here with his shirt raised acting like he has anything worth complaining about. He shouldn't have promised to make an appointment for himself, as well.]

[He's left in the waiting room after, staring alternatively at the clock and the door to the patient exit as time ticks away. Patients come and go. Each time the door opens he sits up a little only for someone in a sling to come out or a child led out by a parent, stroking their head as they suck on a piece of candy with tears in their eyes. It's easy to look away from that kind of scene, look back at the clock. It's only been an hour.]

[He didn't bring anything with him, which he's regretting by now. Aki finally gets up and asks after him at the front desk, but the woman there only frowns at him, looks him over briefly. He'll be done when he's done, is all she says, not bothering to get up and see if he's okay or if something happened. He turns around to sit again and stares at the clock. An hour and five minutes. His foot taps against the floor impatiently. Did something happen? This would be the best place for it to happen, right? But... If they had to take him somewhere else, he'd remember to tell them to tell Aki, right? Right...?]

[And just as his mind is starting to wonder if the ambulance he heard rushing outside is holding Denji, there's a loud Hell yeah! resounding from the back area of the hospital. Aki startles, as do a few other people in the waiting area, some looking around, but for Aki he's flooded with relief. If he's that enthusiastic, surely that means he isn't about to collapse or they haven't decided to take him somewhere else. For once, his propensity to large reactions is a blessing.]

[It makes the couple hours until he comes out bearable, more easily dealt with when he thinks back to that Hell yeah. He feels oddly calm, telling himself that this was a good thing. That maybe Denji got a good prognosis. ...Okay, he doesn't feel calm enough to delude himself, but still. Maybe they have something that can really help him and make his body work the right way.]

[When Denji finally comes out, Aki is up in a moment, both because he sees him and because he sees how wobbly and uneven his steps are. He starts to hurry over just as he finds his way to a chair and slumps into it, the brief calm and sliver of hope washed away as he stands over him with nearly that same furrowed brow from when he sent Denji into the doctor's office to begin with.]

[...And then he's talking about falling in love with a woman, and Aki sighs, the furrow unblending as he sits down next to him, ignoring the outstretched hands.]

You should rest for a minute before we go anywhere.

[He reaches to take a piece of candy from his accumulated stash, then decides against it and reaches further to rub the top of his head. Reward right now.]

I think there's something out there, about falling in love with the person who takes care of you. [Then he reaches down to snag a lollipop.] But you're probably just excited a woman touched you.

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