windfall | light a cigarette, i'll watch as it burns

light a cigarette, i'll watch as it burns

[ Knocking. The roar of ammunition fire in his ears. Blasts of heat and debris sticking to his face, dust crusting in his eyes. A delirious and delicious taste, sweet red like pomegranate, like Aki's skin scraping open in his mouth.

Denji doesn't talk much about what happened that day.

Not unusual, since he doesn't really talk much about any of what transpired prior to meeting Nayuta, either. Or about how sometimes he can still sense, not even hear, but sense a phone ringing in the distance, its pull like a spiral cord that's gone taut, that's trying to make its way back home and if he follows its trail, he might just find someone familiar on the other end of the receiver.

No, he doesn't tell anyone all that, because, see, the last time he did, Kishibe had just hummed and looked at him, the kind of look Denji would get from adults whenever they caught him picking through the dumpster for his next meal: pitying. Then, he'd shook out a flask from the inside of his coat and said, "Sometimes it's better for the line to go dead, kid."

Weird response, right? It'd made Denji go silent, think a bit. And after a while, he hadn't liked that so much, so he'd changed the subject to something inoffensive, like complaining about how much Nayuta's so much better at arcade games than he is, but Kishibe had cut him short at that point to go take a call.

Naturally, Denji had followed.

It's a little sad that a man in his silver years is the only person he can confide in, but Kishibe's not a bad guy — and that's coming from someone who generally hates men. Then again, the guy doesn't show his gaunt face around these parts unless he absolutely has to, which is probably by his own design, so it helps that he's never around long enough for Denji to get sick of seeing him. Up until that conversation, his absence wouldn't have been something Denji paid notice to. It'd usually take weeks and months and Nayuta asking where the funny, drunk geezer who always sneaks her hard candy is for him to see past the everyday chaos of being Tokyo's friendly neighborhood Chainsaw Man.

But as Denji creeped closer, overhearing some words but not registering most of them, a dangerous curiosity brought him to the edge of his hiding spot. What the hell has this dude been up to?

And then he'd froze.

"So the Gun Devil's position has been compromised. Initiate a tactical retreat."

Afterward, he hadn't done anything for a solid week besides go to school, kick some devil ass and stare vacantly at a pair of eggs frying in the pan for dinner each evening. Predictably, Nayuta had rapidly gotten sick of the menu. So before he could make his eighth pair of fried eggs, she'd scaled up his back and twisted his earlobes until he begged for forgiveness.

"Stuuupid! Dummy! Get a hold of yourself!" Nayuta raged on. "No more acting weird, or else I'm putting doggy kibble in your cereal again!"

She was right. He needed to get a hold of himself. Yeah, he was dumb, but that didn't mean he had eggshells for brains. He could still do stuff in his own way.

In the following weeks, Denji spent his time hounding members of the Devil Hunter Club for all and any relevant knowledge pertaining to devils. From rumors about recent devil sightings, to insights into things like the theoretical mechanics behind how long it took for certain types of devils to die in Hell and be reborn, to mathematical equations projecting the survivability rate of fiends based on the velocity and quantity of violence…

Of course, he only understood about three-percent of anything at any given time, but one detail of interest shared by some gloomy, pig-tailed girl stood out to him. According to her, a mysterious amount of devils had been slain in the Kabukicho district, none of which had been reported by either civilian hunters or Public Safety ones.

Anyone with half their wits would be able to easily determine that this wasn't a reasonable lead, but for Denji? He could feel something trilling out to him. ]

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[Of course. Denji gets an awkward-closed-mouth kiss in return as Aki makes a slighly annoyed sound until he finally gets up. He dries off as Denji deals with the laundry and glances over his shoulder when he looks outside to see that the devil is still in the bedroom. Good, he thinks.]

Yeah. In my bag. [A small travel bag he was given with a few changes of clothes. It's made it very apparent his stay here is intended to be short.] ...Never mind, I'll get them. [Changing his mind, he wraps the towel around himself and motions for Denji to step aside, heading to the bag. He doesn't want Denji digging through his things, actually. He'll probably be weird about his underwear or something.]

[His voice low, he asks:] When does she get up?

[ Having stepped out after him, Denji, for a second time, considers the closed door behind which Nayuta should be peacefully snoozing. How long were they cleaning up for again? ]

Uh, probably… Kinda soon —

[ The door whisks open, letting way to a sleepy-eyed Nayuta and her usual entourage, the hoops of their leashes in hand. Her shirt sleeves hang over the fist she raises to scrub away the crumbs from her eyes, but the movement comes to a sudden stop. Brows raised, her gaze flickers from her brother to the stray that's been with them for nearly a week now, both of whom in a similar state of undress. A whiff of something like milk and honey catches her nose, overpowering anything else that may be lingering in the air, which wouldn't normally be cause for annoyance — that's the body wash they all use. But for it to be so strong…

Her expression darkens. When was the last time Denji gave her a bath? Washed her hair? Stupid idiot. ]

Come.

[ She says, tersely, to the dogs, particularly the few tugging at their harness to greet Denji and Aki. Her mouth purses, as she has to dig her heels in to get them to register the command. Grrr, these ill-behaved animals. All of them! ]

Hey! I said come!

[ As always, it takes some wrangling, but they do eventually heed her call and follow after her as she marches out the door. ]

[ It's only after Nayuta's left that Denji's towel drops from his waist to the floor. He doesn't bend to pick it up, too preoccupied with staring after the girl. ]

…Just remembered. She takes the dogs out to pee before giving 'em breakfast.

[The way she huffs and stomps out like she caught them eating her pudding from the fridge... Can she tell?]

[He doesn't know. He doesn't know if she even has the understanding of what sex is. She might look like a child, but at the end of the day, she's a devil. Immaturity only goes so far when you're a creature led by id. He would know.]

Yeah, well. [He continues onward, taking the time that they have now to get a fresh set of clothes out of his bag.] Go get dressed before she comes back. [Nothing to do about it. He looks at Denji as he pulls his underwear on, frowning at him.] You said she doesn't like people touching you, or being too close to you. Don't you think that's something you should train out of her? [He can't exactly live an adult life never being physically intimate with people.]

[ Train her? Seriously? His eyes flutter up in an eye roll. ]

Well, yeah, I wanna teach her.

[ On his way to Aki's side, he kicks the towel up and catches it before squishing up against him, trying to peer into his duffel bag. Then, just to be annoying, Denji's hand flashes out to snatch, at the same time, a fresh pair of his underwear and a shirt he can wear under his school uniform.

Denji speaks as he holds the shirt spread out to judge if it'll fit him. ]

But I think it's just gonna take her getting used to being around us at the same time, y'know? Like, maybe, we need to hangout somewhere fun together. So it doesn't feel like she's less important…

[Denji snatches a set of his underwear and Aki pauses, staring at him openly, brows set and frown heavy. He's about to say something about how his clothes won't even fit him, anyway - but when he holds the shirt out and it actually seems to match his proportions, he shuts up. He saw it before, understood it before, but... There's a weird part of him that's happy to see him with muscle mass now. That he's built up his body from the bony runt he was before.]

I don't know if that's a good idea yet. She won't even talk to me most of the time.

[As if the blame lays solely with her when he barely talks to her, either. Yesterday while Denji recovered in bed they ate dinner together in silence.]

She probably doesn't understand sex yet - so don't bring it up to her. Just say you woke up early and we used the shower together, or something.

[Way more normal. Totally chill behavior.]

[ His brow wavers. ]

When will it be a good idea?

[ The shirt glides easy over his shoulders, the fit not too tight, not too loose; Denji looks himself up and down, lifting an arm to sniff at one of his pits, and, satisfied, quickly moves on to drawing Aki's underwear up. The waistband hangs low on his hips, a slip of his navel still visible when his shirt flutters as he heads to the window, but it is what it is. He hasn't been able to do the laundry recently.

Denji bends one of the slats in his blinds. The sun hasn't risen yet, but there are a few furry shapes milling around the yard, sniffing, still trying to find a spot to finish their business. Huskies are so picky, but at least it's a good thing in this instance. ]

I'll just tell her what you told me. One of your hands doesn't work very well, right? So you need more help in the bath.

[Aki ignores that first question for now. Doesn't want to give any kind of answer he's going to regret later. If he says something random like "In a week" he'll be counting down the days. And Aki knows he won't be here that long.]

[But he forgot that he lied about his hand. The way he says it, Aki can't tell if he believes his lie or if he's just testing out the words. After a hesitant pause, he nods. Sure. Fine. Denji never did help him in the bath back then, but like hell she's going to know that.]

[Fully dressed, he briefly looks Denji over with a frown. He doesn't love that he's wearing his clothes, but still says nothing about it. Judging by the pile of laundry that was in that bedroom, maybe he just hasn't gotten around to washing everything yet. But still, she's a devil. Won't she smell it on him? Maybe this is part of training - or, "teaching" her out of it.]

You're going to school, right? [Said with the assumption that the answer is a resounding "Yes."] I'll make you both something to eat. Go get dressed.

[ Spot on. If Nayuta can only smell Aki between the two of them, surely, that'll wash out any differentiation between their scents, and therefore set her on the path of, well, associating good feelings with their temporary roommate. That's how devil psychology works — maybe? Denji's 70% of the way sure, anyway. …And, okay, okay, he just wants to hang on to Aki a little longer, sue him. ]

…Yeah, I'm goin', [ he detachedly says back to Aki, as if it were something he just decided to agree to in the moment. The fair warning in Aki's voice may have had something to do with that. He starts to enter the bedroom, passing by Meowy, her tail briefly brushing against Denji's ankle. ] If you need help with breakfast, ask Nayuta. She's had her fun — [ At the cost of a whole street in Shinjuku sinking into the ground. ] I think she'll try to be good this time.

[ With that, the door slides shut. ]

[ A little over five minutes later, another one opens.

Released from their tethers, the dogs all rush inside, overly energetic in that way dogs usually are after a good poop. Tiramisu's sniffing along the lining of the cabinet that holds all their kibble — that doggy's always been a smart one. She treats Aki as non-existent, if he's already in the kitchen, folding herself into the compact area, barely avoiding stepping on a fluffy paw or tail. ]

Outta the way, Creamy. [ Her nickname for Cream Puff. She stuffs the dog's face aside to reach where Tiramisu's at, doing the same to the other dog as well. ] Don't be bad, either of you. You know the penalty is to balance a bucket on your head!

[ Bits of dried food pour out eight times each; since some of them get territorial, the dogs and Meowy have their own food bowl, their name glossing the side in permanent marker. They all have to share from the same basin for water, though, so while their jaws are snapping away, Nayuta carries the water tray to the sink, careful not to slosh what's in there over the heads of their pets. Less careful as she passes Aki by and dumps the old water down the drain.

A glance. ]

Half-gun. [ Hard to say whether she's trying to insult him to his face or actually address him. ] Are you making that thing you made before? Don't put in as much of that green stuff in like last time.

[Half-Gun. Of all the things he's thought of himself as in the previous year, all the harsh words he's tortured himself with, that one didn't come up. He glances down at the devil before looking back at the countertop. Considers fully ignoring her as he chops the green onion into thin slices.]

You aren't going to convince me of anything if you can't even call me by my name.

[He doesn't care about how healthy she is. If she eats a proper diet, gets enough greens and a varied diet. He might actually do what she says if the meal wasn't also going to Denji, who does need those things.]

And stop yelling at the dogs. Giving them attention when they're bad only makes them act up to get more of it.

[Something he learned from Denji.]

[ I don't know your name, she stubbornly wants to say, knowing full well he would see through the lie. Not just because Denji is always crowing after the man these days, reaching for him with the hands she used to drag with her on walks with the dogs, but with his big mouth, it's obvious he's told her about him long before the gunpowder-reeking hybrid stepped foot into their home. She knows that he helped him kick in the balls of some sword head they fought, that he always nagged Denji for not sorting his clothes a specific way, and that he went from two arms to one, that even when he was purely human, clearly he wasn't a complete one. She even knows what his tombstone looks like, and she knows that Denji oozes with his scent, as well as something else, every time she sees them side-by-side. ]

Oh… So you still care about that sort of thing. That's sure human of you, Aki Hayakawa.

[ The basin's only halfway full. There's time to kill. She turns, casting her gaze — not an unkind one — over the lot of them merrily eating away. ]

I know that, duh. I yell at them because I like it when they want my attention.

Don't speak on humanity when you don't have an ounce of it.

[She's just trying to get under his skin. He knows it. But it's been so long since he dealt with anyone like this - Is that why she's able to peel back the layer so easily? No, maybe it's the way Gun reacts to her. Twisting around like it's hard to breathe.]

At least take them out of the kitchen. They're going to make me trip. [One of them keeps weaving too close to his legs, sniffing up at the counter when he starts chopping up sausage and whining when he pushes it away by the nose.] A good owner doesn't need to demand their attention.

I have Denji. [ She whips the words out like a switchblade she had prepared in her back pocket. ] He's way heavier than an ounce.

[ That's not what he means, Nayuta gets that, but she's been itching to say it. To declare her ownership a second time, in case she didn't make it clear the first. She also gets that Denji's not quite like other humans, that it isn't just his heart that sets him apart. He's so stupid, hopelessly trying to breathe underwater despite being an animal that can only live locked to the land. What Half-Gun's been doing is trying to give a dog scuba gear. It's funny, but tiring to watch — that's why she's the only shepherd he needs. The only family.

She shuts the faucet off, stooping down to pick up the fussing dog's half-empty bowl and shaking the contents as she leads it away. ]

But I guess you're trying to say you're a better owner than me?

[Right. This conversation again. Having Denji versus Denji being his own person. Aki knows not to jump on it, knows to let sleeping dogs lie. Denji doesn't need the added stress.]

[...His ass kind of hurts, come to think of it.]

I'm not arguing anything with you.

[Blunt. Straightforward. Since he's not the head of the house and can't exactly report her misbehavior to a superior, he can't treat this situation like he did in the past. Even if some of the ways she speaks and moves remind him uncomfortably of Power.]

[At least it's not Makima.]

[He continues making breakfast, miso soup, a fried egg sunny side up. Sausage on the side, a small salad. A normal breakfast. A healthy breakfast. No one in the right mind can complain about that.]

[He places the dishes down in front of the devil first, then fills out the rest of the table. Pointing to the salad, he says,] Finish it all and you get dessert.

Why not? You trying to get on Denji's good side?

[ Before it can register that it's likely he's just following his own advice and not donating his attention to anyone trying to rile him up, dog or devil, Nayuta's gaze switches to the food-brimmed table. All of it smells goo — er, acceptable, but because the Gun specifies the salad, she makes a show of sniffing at it twice. Her nose picks up sesame mingled in with a sweet acidity in the dressing. It'll probably taste just fine.

She looks up at him, an expectant hand held out. ]

If you gimme dessert now… [ I'll eat it all, Nayuta almost says, but actually, she doesn't think this guy cares that much about that. Or about her. Which is fine, the feeling's mutual, but what's something she could dangle that might put him in his place? ]

I'll tell you something about yesterday. When he left you for me.

[Denji's good side, huh. What good has that ever gotten him? Even if he's on his good side, half the time he tells him the weirdest translation of his thoughts that Aki has to mull through to get to the root of. And then it turns out to be something simple like being lonely. Mourning. Basic human emotions that he should understand by now. Someone else should have had these conversations with him years ago.]

[But then she offers that, and it seems like something Aki should consider. Given how yesterday went - that phone call, how he crawled into bed with him, told him to accept his hand as some sort of repayment while refusing to explain what he was being repayed for. What he's repenting for.]

[But he also lived with Power for half a year and just as soon as he looks up to listen to her, he looks back down to place his hands together and silently thank whoever it is for the meal.]

Denied. Eat your greens.

Eat my…

[ …As she thought, Aki Hayakawa needs to die.

It's just as her thinking begins to twist and ripple out like the scores within a chain-link fence, Denji reappears, shaking out the dog hair from his uniform jacket. Nayuta quickly moves her sights to him, staring at her brother as if he were doing something impressively tiresome. He gives her an unspoken what? in return, seating himself between them. Scoffing, she copies the other hybrid, clapping her hands together and looking away. ]

You two gettin' chummy?

[ Whispered to Aki as Nayuta grumpily tears into a bed of greens. He heard some talking from inside the bedroom, but nothing too clear as to give him an idea of what they were discussing. But from his perspective, coming out to see nobody bleeding or swearing, as well as all the furniture intact, is as good a sign as any.

Maybe I should push for the family trip, anyway…

Family. It's a slip of the tongue, except not really, because he didn't say it aloud, but Denji still feels sheepish just thinking it. Awkward and complicated, and a little hopeful. Aki said it wasn't a good idea, but maybe he'll bring it up again later. Trips are an important part of normal living. In the meanwhile, he takes a stab at his own salad bowl. ]

What're you gonna do while we're gone, Aki? I don't wanna always make ya act like a wife or somethin' and clean up after us the whole time. Maybe you should do… fun stuff?

[There's a flicker of - something. Something in his gut hated that. The way she looked at him, maybe? Aki isn't sure. But Denji comes out shaking his jacket around in the air and the feeling fades a little. If it is Gun, why is he only distressed by Control? Shouldn't he be just as upset by Denji?]

[Whatever. He doesn't care about that thing. He's about to start eating when Denji first asks him if they're getting chummy - of course not, but all he does is return a raised eyebrow, as if asking if he actually thinks that, but his entire brow raises at what he says next. A wife...?? He thinks he's acting like a housewife...?!]

Fun stuff...

[Doesn't he get that he's gone through trauma? Aki doesn't want to do fun stuff. He picks up his own bowl of salad and mixes it with the dressing, frowning down at it.]

Maybe I'll go day drinking. [Said wryly.] I'll find something to busy myself. I always do. [Briefly he glances at the devil, as if debating saying this in front of her, but decides she's really not that threatening when Denji, himself, is around, so who cares.] Just make sure that you don't have too much "fun," yourself. [He knows what he means. No chainsaw-ing.]

[After a moment, almost off-handedly, he mutters to himself,] Maybe I'll stop by the old place. [And maybe he's just tired, or not thinking, but in that brief moment of half-thought he actually forgets that he destroyed that building. That he destroyed the entire neighborhood. He takes a bite, then reaches for the dressing and adds a splash more to the bowl.]

[ Day drinking… Denji tilts his head with a hum as he eats, as if to say, Well, that's an idea. Not realizing Aki is joking until he's moved on to other ideas. Truthfully, that would have been fine, if he really wanted to introduce a few beer cases to their fridge — he guesses the feds don't usually let their devils destress and booze it up. Dumb rules. He tries to imagine coming home to a tipsy Aki again, after all this time. Shoulders looser, face pinked with a good buzz; that wouldn't be so bad.

But then he mentions their old apartment. Though Denji still feeds food into his mouth, his lips twitch down into a skeptical frown. Clearly thinking back to last night, how he'd found him in the bedroom. Hovering over the box. Aki's box, so he'd had a right to sift through its contents, technically. It's just… It'd bothered him how that chipped and ruined blade of his tilted so easily into his palm, breaking skin, making him look paler than a sheet with cut-out holes for eyes. Paler than Denji, and he was the one with the fever. Or maybe his paleness suited more that of someone emerging from the wreckage of an accident, face painted in dust and soot, finding air for the first time.

Who knows. He's not sure if he wants to see it again. He'd bear it, though, if it meant not letting Aki out of his sight for more than he already has to. ]

Oh, really? [ It comes out calm. Almost lazy, in that usual way of his. He's stopped eating. ] If you wait for me, I could go with you. I'll go straight home this time —

[ Loud slurps come from Nayuta's end as she sips from her soup, prompting Denji to turn and look at her. Expecting her to have an opinion, at this point. "Don't be so clingy, Denji. Aren't there some things even a Half-Gun can want to do on his own?" ]

[ After a moment of thinking it over, he says: ] Don't call him that.

[ As for her question, reluctance punctuates his steadily bunching brow. Jerking off comes to mind, but Aki doesn't really need to go off to a boarded up neighborhood to do that. Still… there probably are other experiences Aki can only have without him there. ] Umm… But yeah, I guess, that's true. [ He glances back at the man in question. ] Up to you.

[Aki begins to say something about how Denji was asking him what he was planning to do while he was gone, that them going together would kind of defeat that purpose, but under that he's a little concerned with his clinginess, how this isn't like how he was before. How he never asked what Aki was up to on the weekends, how he was never so nosy to invite himself along to things. And is he still like that, or is it different because it's Aki? He doesn't know. But before he can think much of any of that, the devil is calling him Half-Gun again and he seriously wants to smack her in the head.]

[...But Denji mostly deals with it, so he looks down and takes a long drink from his glass.]

I don't mind either way. If you wanted to go by there - I just wondered how the neighborhood was...

[...And then it hits him. That he blew it up.]

[He downs the rest of the drink, setting the empty glass down and exhaling. Opens his eyes and looks at the devil. He needs a distraction, right now. She's one.]

If all you plan to do is antagonize me, I'll treat you like the other devils I've dealt with. Denji can attest to how fun that is. [He lets that mild threat sink in for a moment.] They don't get anything sweet.

[He points to himself.]

Aki. Surely even you can remember two syllables.

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