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01 — i know that it's your soul, but could you bottle it up?
[it's the slowest part of the day: the tail-end, just thirty minutes before closing, and she can feel the weariness sink into her like a wrecked ship. they've mostly gotten to-go orders for the past hour; no one's been wanting to stay to chat, what with the frosty gusts, and the probability of snow increasing with each day. if they had a drive-thru, their regulars would probably use that instead.
hell, she would too, if she had a car.
finally, having wiped down her last table, she calls out to the back of the coffee shop:] Hey, I'm finished out here, do you need any help?
hell, she would too, if she had a car.
finally, having wiped down her last table, she calls out to the back of the coffee shop:] Hey, I'm finished out here, do you need any help?
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so, instead of looking back, she looks up. akira's face is unreadable, and, maybe, that in itself says something.]
Huh? [she blinks, slowly registering his question, the gears in her head still turning. ren, the guy had said with conviction, with familiarity. the name rings a bell, but distantly. she's heard it in the past, she just can't pinpoint where.] Oh! Takoyaki? Yeah, sure. If you pay for it, I can grab drinks, if you want?
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[akira relaxes a bit and lets go of sunny's wrist, glad that his grip hadn't become vice-like. small victories, right? at any rate, he doesn't hear his name—if you can even call it that now—being called anymore, so. even better.
he heads toward the takoyaki stand. just think about food. food is easy to think about, especially when you're hungry. not that he has as much of an appetite anymore, because of—no. think about food.
don't think about masato fuuji.]
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Hey, let's go somewhere a little quieter. Also, uh, here. [she's holding a glass bottle of sangria in each hand, one outstretched toward him. since she's still nineteen, sunny technically shouldn't be able to buy alcohol... but, luckily for her, she'd gotten a fake id made awhile ago, from back in her days at mds.] The alcohol content's pretty low and I figured, you know, it's New Years. We should celebrate — oh, but, if you don't want to take it, you shouldn't. I could get you a water bottle once we've moved, so... no pressure.
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Oh. [he seems a little surprised, but he takes the offered sangria, blinking curiously at sunny.] Thank you. This is fine. [he sounds especially grateful; and really, it's not just for the drink, but because of how sunny is putting up with everything that's happened so far. akira seems a little surprised she's just been rolling with it.]
I got, um. [rather than articulate anything, he just holds up the bag of food for her examination.]
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[this time, she's the one to grasp his wrist, using the same amount of care and delicacy he had handled her with, to pull him along] C'mon, I think that I saw an empty bench earlier.
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[thankfully, he doesn't have rent to pay, since he's staying with a family friend. his parents send money occasionally, and it's enough to cover the basic necessities... the rest, he just works for. at any rate, he doesn't have an inordinate amount of bills to pay, so it really isn't that big a deal. granted, the food prices were a little jacked up because it's new year's and anything within walking distance of the square tends to be pricier by virtue of convenience, but it's not like he's going to go broke from indulging a little.
...and anyway, akira feels a little warm when sunny starts to gently pull him off in the direction of the bench she had seen. it's nothing like the exaggerated feelings people discuss in manga, but it feels a little like...being looked after. it's overwhelming in some inexplicable way.]
...okay. [he follows her lead docilely, only sparing a brief glance back.]
SHE'S SO EMBARRASSING I'M SORRY
Ahhhh, that hits the spot. I wish I knew how to make these myself. [much like before, she wedges another one between her chopsticks; instead of immediately consuming it though, she stretches her hand out in offering, making sure that the ball is level with akira's mouth] Here, try some before I lose all self-control and eat them all.
ITS OK I LOVE HER
...Thank you for the meal. [aaaand chomp. he takes the entire thing with his teeth and pulls back to chew thoughtfully, exhaling some steam at points because JEEZ THIS THING IS STILL HOT. to his credit, he doesn't start speaking again until he's finished swallowing.]
I've seen people make some using machines on Youtube... The ones with grids of circles and you're supposed to add batter in them and rotate them with toothpicks as they cook.
[akira seems to have perked up now, because now he's quickly pulling apart his own disposable chopsticks, brushing off some splinters. quick, sunny, eat more before akira sics himself on the remaining ones...!]
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[gingerly dipping a dumpling into some soy sauce, she waves it a little, in hopes of cooling it down, and then blows on it for good measure] Yhoor ginda tiff — [stops herself from continuing to speak around the dumpling, taking some time to chew and swallow before repeating herself]
You're kinda different from how you are at work. Although, I'm sure that's how everyone is. [after sucking the tips of her chopsticks clean of any residual sauce, she begins gnawing lightly on them in contemplation] Is this your first job?
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How so? [he's surveying the containers now, as if figuring out which food to eat next is a decision that requires Intense Meditation.] And yeah, it's probably the first one that decided to take me.
You're a little different at work, too. A lot more... [suddenly akira straightens up and flashes a cheerful look in an alarmingly natural 180, his voice gone warm and inviting without being overly saccharine.] Welcome! How are you? Our specials today are— [and then, just as quickly, he's suddenly looking more himself again, slouching a little.] Or something like that.
1/2
2/2
[upon realizing that she isn't getting anywhere, she makes a mildly frustrated noise] I guess what I'm trying to say is... I didn't think you would be so — funny. Easy to talk to. You just seemed more like... an Edward Cullen than a Jacob Black.
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It's not a bad thing. If anything, it means you adapt well. No shame in that, right?
[and anyway, even with masks, how much is truly fake? if you can muster that kind of upbeat optimism, doesn't that mean some part of you could believe it? maybe it's deceptive, but people lie by nature, and having different personas in your day to day life is just another part of that, isn't it?]
[still, the comparison makes akira wrinkle his nose a bit.] Can I be someone cooler than a stalker vampire and a werewolf who imprints on someone's newborn? [never mind that this sentence is totally incriminating because it implies he's read the whole series. he's still smiling a little at sunny, rolling his shoulders in what could be a shrug.]
Do I come across as unsocial at work?
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N-No! I didn't mean to imply that... [she's silent for a moment, trying to think her next words out more carefully.] You just come across as someone who plays it close to his chest — at all times. You don't give away much, even when you're being friendly. So, it's... a little difficult to get to know you.
...but that was only really a first impression. Don't look too deep into it. [and it's not as if he owes anyone any information about himself. when you're a celebrity, it's different. people dig. they want to devour every secret, every detail, until there's nothing left for yourself.
to quell the growing sense of awkwardness swelling in the pit of her stomach, she takes a swig out of her drink, ahhhhhh. in her embarrassment, she'd tipped her bottle a little too much, her mouth overflowing and causing some of the beverage to dribble down her chin.]
Oh, damn it, fuck, augh, can you hand me a napkin?
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after a few moments, he looks at her again, his expression gentling.]
Would you say you know me better now?
[his tone is maybe just a liiiittle bit teasing.]
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after a moment of musing:] Not at all. I can't imagine that you'd want me to.
[for a second, the most traitorous of thoughts penetrates through — but i'd like to — and sunny returns to her dabbing, with more force this time, as if to stamp it out. her collar looks a little worse for wear now, but she seems pleased all the same.]
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Why not?
[it's been peaceful for a while, but akira hasn't forgotten about the near run-in with masato, or the fact that sunny hasn't tried at all so far to pry about it. he'd been mentally steeling himself to answer questions, but nothing. not even a "who was that?"]
Even though we were stuck at work longer today, it's been fun so far.
[he stops, looking pensive. there are a lot of things he could say, but none of them feel right.]
...I think it'd be nice hanging out like this again.
[not that the night is over yet, but... in any case, akira wordlessly places the other half of the okonomiyaki box closer to sunny.]
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[it comes out blandly, mostly from the shock that it'd never quite occurred to her that they could do that — share dinner like this again, under a half-lit lamp, talking the night away until the cold finally gets to them. no catches. no consequences.
she looks at the offered okonomiyaki, and then hesitantly, but deftly, begins to portion out her half into bite-sized pieces.]
Can we? [her voice is tiny and weak, but she doesn't repeat herself] Because I'd really like that.
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[he'd been normal at some point, then on the cusp of becoming something. akira remembers the camaraderie he'd shared with masato and the others, before things changed. maybe it's the kind of thing you never really get over—having that company, then losing it, and trying to remember what it's like to continue day-by-day without it. up until you find other people to fill in the spaces left behind, in their own ways. sometimes better ones.]
Besides, it's nice seeing you outside of customer service mode. [he tilts his head a bit, offering sunny a small smile, before he goes for a fishball from the other container, placing it on top of his okonomiyaki so that some of the sauces bleed into it.]
We're not that different, are we. [it's not a question. sunny had said he played things close to his chest, giving away little. but sunny wasn't especially dissimilar from that notion, either.]
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You sure —
[" — know how to eat, ren." the name, the one she feels like she should recognize but doesn't, is caught between a growl and a harsh laugh. either way, it sounds ugly in the cold, open air and it doesn't come out of her mouth, so she looks up. it's not the same guy from earlier standing before them, it's someone arguably angrier.
"masato called, said he saw you, and — god. god, here you are. you, always with the surprises, huh."]
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well, once upon a time, they'd been four.
akira doesn't quite stiffen when he first hears the newcomer; he places the new voice immediately, but it's as though he doesn't quite react. still, the signs are there if anyone knows where to look: the way his mouth smooths from a smile to a neutral line, the way his shoulders tense minutely, the way his relaxed grip on his chopsticks goes tighter in the span of a split second.
it looks like the new year is determined to drag out the worst of his old history in front of the first person he's made meaningful interaction with in months.]
Satoru. [he says it politely, or as politely as it gets; there's little meaningful inflection to his voice. he makes a vague gesture at the food.] At least some things don't change, right?
[he meets satoru's gaze.] Didn't know Masato was supposed to be keeping tabs on me. Is it really a surprise I'm at the square for New Year's Eve?
[the dryness in akira's voice is tangible, and satoru knows it. akira sees the exact moment when satoru draws himself up to full height, which looks impressive enough when akira is seated, but if they were both standing, they'd be evenly matched. "you shouldn't even bother to be showing your face around aurozora anymore," satoru says. "you're done."]
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it isn't her place to intervene, but... someone's got to do damage control. fidgeting with her chopsticks, sunny, in her meekest voice, tries for a diplomatic approach:] Um, maybe... this isn't the right time to have this conversation...
[without even shooting her a glance, satoru's voice cleanly cuts in, a dagger to the ribs.
"there's never a right time," he bites out, taking a single step forward. for a moment, she thinks satoru's going to throw a fist or, at least, pull akira up by his collar. rough him up a bit. instead, he raises his chin, looks down on akira with unbridled disdain, as if daring him to differ. "so, we're not going to have a conversation. i'm just going to speak and you're just going to listen."
her teeth peek out, scraping against her bottom lip. this is awkward. sunny's not sure if she should stay there or leave or try to futilely continue to smooth things over. she's about to shoot akira a helpless look, but her gaze falls on his knuckles.
suddenly, she stands, ignoring the look satoru sends her way.]
Akira, we can go. Tell me you want to leave and we'll leave.
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his gaze flickers to sunny when she speaks, and he purses his lips a little, seemingly steeling himself. there's a sorry, sunny on the tip of his tongue but the words don't form yet, because at that moment, satoru interjects again, this time with a dark "leave? like you did last time? don't make me laugh."]
No, we're not going to have a conversation, because there never was one. That's what you've done all along. You always speak, and I'm always the one listening.
[he offers sunny a proper apologetic look, his voice low as he .] Sorry you got caught up in this. You should take the rest of the food home [he stands up as well, looking a little resigned, and steps in front of sunny as if shielding her. then he addresses satoru.] Look, let's hash this out where people won't listen, if you care at all about the others.
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...okay. [she makes quick work of stuffing lids back down on containers and gathering everything into their respective bags, hanging them from the crook of her arm. it... doesn't feel quite right to leave like this, so she fishes a pen out of her purse, and strides over to akira, carefully taking his hand and laying it palm-side open on her own. sunny scrawls her phone number.]
Call me if you need anything. [with a click of the back-end of her pen, its tip receding in, she turns on her heel.] Get home safe, alright?
[and then, as he'd suggested, she leaves, the sound of her footsteps consumed by the celebrations around them.]
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he doesn't find it in him to protest against any of the accusations satoru levels at him in the argument that ensues. part of him is just—tired. worn out. he's heard the same things for a while, heard twenty different variations of "you're not going to get anywhere in life" for the past year. right when things seem like they're picking up, it all hits zero again, like a fresh slate without any actual new start. it's a familiar feeling now: internalizing that level of futility, the uselessness in correcting people's misconceptions when they don't care to listen.
it's a long night.
later, he gets home to an empty house and navigates like a silent wraith, mindful of all the different reasons he isn't supposed to be there. he crashes onto his bed—a temporary set-up in the attic—after a quick shower, as if a cold rinse will wash out everything he's heard in the past hour, and unlocks his phone. sunny's neat scrawl peeks out from the planes of his palm, half-hidden by the phone. after a pause, he navigates to add a new contact, titling it simply as "sunny".
another moment of hesitation, and he starts on a text.]
I'm sorry about earlier. That's one way to ruin someone's New Year's Eve, huh?
[he doesn't sign his name, but she'll probably get the point. it belatedly occurs to him it's late, and she should be sleeping, but hopefully she keeps her phone on silent at night... it's probably the last thing she needs to think about when she probably has work the next day. no rest, not even on new year's day, for people in the service industry. akira isn't on shift at the coffee shop on new year's, but he has some hours to cover at the flower shop, because even after new year's eve, it's still a busy time.]
s h i b e
wao
gimme the catfe au lait
here is ur catfe au lait.... except it is cold and 2 weeks late
I'LL STILL DRINK IT. I WILL CONSUME THE ENTIRE CUP
this reply was an intense combo of me writing at work and rigging up the posting on phone huehue